Hey Kimball!
* Q: Why did Bryan J.
Rollins cross the road?
A: His eyebrow
ring was stuck on the chicken.
* Two Bryan J. Rollins
clones were flying an airplane. They're were approching the landing strip, but
it looked really... I mean REALLY
short. "You'd better extend the flaps more. that is one short
runway" said one Bryan J. Rollins clone to the other. "It's looking
shorter. More flaps! Still too short! FULL FLAPS!" Kablam! The two Bryan
J. Rollins clones crashed the plane. "Man!" exclaimed one of the
Bryan J. Rollins clones, "That was THE shortest runway I've ever
seen!" "Yeah," replied the other, "but is was SO
WIDE!" Ha.
* Q: How many Bryan J.
Rollins clones does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: Three. One
to do it, and two more to make a shirt with his/their name on it and sell it to
people in his dorm, as well as one sucker in Branner.
* Bryan J. Rollins was
on the roof of the Empire State Building with another tourist he didn't know.
The other tourist introduced himself as Clark, and remarked on the strong
winds. "Duh" replied Bryan J. Rollins (he was none too bright). Said
Clark, "I bet the wind is so strong, if I jumped off it would blow me right
back up here." Bryan J. Rollins replied, "Duh." Sure enough, Clark
jumped off the edge, fell maybe halfway down, began to slow, and eventually
shot right back up, landing right where he lept
from.
"Duh. I can do that." thought Bryan J. Rollins. He jumped off the
building head first and was instantly killed upon impact with the sidewalk.
Lois Lane walked up to Clark and said, "Geez, Superman.. that wasn't very
nice."
* Q: What's the
difference between a dead dog in the middle of the road, and a dead Bryan J.
Rollins?
A: The dog was
wearing his roller blade, knee and elbow pads when he was hit by the car.
P.S. My address
is:
and
coincidentally, my birthday is August 31st! Send checks or
money orders to
the above address.
--
Alex Suter
asuter@cs.stanford.edu
"I am not a
crackpot!"